It finally happened. My husband was transferred. He's in sales, so we knew it was only a matter of time (it's what we signed up for, after all). We just didn't know exactly when or where, and because of this I was able to ignore the possibility. But it's real and it's happening in just a few weeks whether or not I choose to think about it.
We bought a house in Grand Rapids, Michigan. We sold our house in Minneapolis. We scheduled our pack, load and delivery dates. We fixed all the broken crap in our house. Most of the tasks that have kept us so busy and frazzled are complete. Now it's just the saying goodbye, and that shit gets just a little bit too real for my liking. I'm leaving my sister who is due with her first baby on July 1. Her daughter won't know me like my kids know her and I can't even think about that just yet. Better save it for a lonely night in Michigan when I can finish off a few bottles of wine in someone else's house that happens to contain my belongings.
We are leaving great friends, some who are more like family at this point. It's going to be gut wrenching the moment my oldest finally realizes how far we are from everyone he knows and loves in Minnesota. He won't remember this move, but I will. We are talking about getting him a puppy; partly out of guilt, partly because we want the snuggles.
It's not going to hit me until the house is unpacked and the kids are settled and everything is painted and decorated just the way I like it. Then I will realize that none of my friends are there and my sister isn't a short walk away anymore and I have to start all over again. Fuck.
I can't even say that we are going somewhere warmer. It's just as cold and I think we will have even more snow.
But we will also have a (much) bigger house and a huge yard. Even some woods for adventureing. We will have a long-ass driveway on a quiet culdisac in the country and I have already picked out a kick ass power wheels for the boys (or a size 3 car according to my oldest).
My husband will work from home and won't travel all the time. We will have more time together as a family and life will be less hectic.
I'm not a super emotional person (about things that actually matter - I WILL cry when I get really hungry). I like to get on with it and live my life and look to the future. But unfortunately that doesn't always work. Sometimes you have to feel the feels. The excitement of a new adventure quickly wears off as the drudgery of everyday life settles in. That's what might drive me to the brink so I have to stay vigilant.
So come visit, Minneapolis friend family. Come often and stay as long as you like. We have the room, and I'll feed you, caffeinate you and once all the kids are lost in the woods we can drink on the deck in peace (I'm sure the wolves will take them in after recognizing their wild nature).
I'm thinking about starting a social group in Michigan for smart-ass moms who talk a lot of shit but deep down are actually devoted to their children. Potential applicants would have to pass a sarcasm test and be able to take a fucking joke (if you can't laugh at the absurdity of motherhood than I don't want to know you). If any of my loyal readers know a few bitches who might be cool to hang out with while we loosely supervise our children, please send along their info.
Also I need to know where all the drive-through coffee shops are. That's actually more important. I can't make friends until I have located convenient coffee. It's not safe for anyone. Baby steps.